Native Talk

This time, when I was walking past through the familiar roads of my native town, Madurai, the way I viewed the happenings around me was far more different than how I used to see the same place during my childhood days. There happened to be no change in the mindsets of people though. Their customs, traditions, perspectives about life and the expectations from life all remained the same.

The people here are a set of contented group for whom there is no better heaven than Madurai. Goddess Meenakshi was there guiding them in every walks of life. Though the children from many of the families have got settled in metros and places abroad, their parents felt at peace in their small homes that they had built in the past out their scrimpy savings as a govt employee of those good old days.

I happened to accidentally meet few girls who were my childhood schoolmates. I made no delay in recognizing them as they looked the same they looked when I left that school after my 10th class. But the case was not the same with them. As I never looked like one of them. After leading more than 4 years of life in metros anyone would have evolved from a small-town girl look. When I was enquiring about what they are doing and also about few other frens of mine, all I got the answer was that most of them were married with at least a kid. I even got to meet one girl who was always marveled as the tallest girl of our school (particularly by me ;) ) with her 3 year old kid.

For a while I was shocked to see that girls still don’t get to follow their dreams in most of the families in towns like this. But then the reality was different. Many of them liked to be what they are though apparently for reasons that this is what any normal girl’s life at Madurai would look like. Maybe people lacked the courage to go chase their dreams or even to dream rather. Or they just are forced to abide by the custom of the society.

In any case these girls were happy. After all what do we live on this earth for? Ultimately to be happy! And that I could see in their eyes behind all those buried dreams. Although there was a trace of longing for a life like mine, there were no regrets about their present. This does not tell all about the city and its people. This city had traces of everything. People like me and people like the girls I met.

The economy here also has seen its boom these years and the bustling activity in and around the city and the town hall says it all. You don’t see flashy cars much on the roads but the air is fresh and free from any pollution. You would not like to drive through the narrow crowded roads and broken bridges but behind the conservative minds of the people you certainly would love the warmth they show. There is a truth in the way they live and people don’t regret for what they have in life.
Above all they live and let live!

Cheers!

Sukanya Krishnan

27th August 2006

I decided to write about what has been going through my mind- eating my time, energy and concentration out for the past few days.

A sense of deprivation, a strong feeling of loss and unreasonable illusion about the future is all what I can put them if at all I have to express them in words. I was observing all that was going on at the back of my mind. I was making a trifle effort to come out of the ‘mental agony’ I was undergoing. Was that an agony or am I exaggerating? I don’t want to reconsider. It was an agony. I am a happy go lucky person and any small 'PJ' (Poor Joke) can bring laughter from inside me. Then what did I lack in life that made me go on searching for it. Have I seriously lost anything? Is there anything called loss?

All the time we possess something or the other, either an identity or an object or a company or some work and what not. Then what did I lack. I had everything in life. I was into one of the nation’s top Bschools. I had very supportive parents and family. A great group of friends! Then what the hell was going wrong? Am I hallucinating? I had to find out… There begins my search. Life, as it takes its twists and turns, teaches lots of lessons in its own mysterious way. How much have I learnt out of it so far? Hmmm..I think I have done fairly good amount of churnings about my experiences with life. But how much did I apply? The score board was empty when I tried to evaluate. I was surprised to see I have never applied any of my learning. But! Why? Have I not learnt them properly? There came the answer. The lessons never get repeated. Once you have learnt one lesson you are pushed to the next one. And now I have stepped into a new phase of education on life. Sounds interesting! New phase! What was that? I would never know till it ends. That’s the way it goes. How abstruse? But what is that am gonna do with my mental state. Go with the Flow!! Yes! That’s the best way to treat. Sit back and relax.. Life is a journey that takes care of everything all by itself.

All you have to do is mentally sit back and relax. Mind you! I repeat MENTALLY! Do your duty! Results will follow. It indeed works. And the sense of satisfaction that follows is truly amazing.

Signing off with a zeal to touch the sky
Sukanya.

While i was ruminating....

Pasted from my other blog...

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Learning – a never ending process

Before I spell out my thoughts on the above subject I would like to share those words that decorate my work table.

Lessons are repeated until they are learned.
A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can go on to the next lesson.
Learning lessons does not end.
There's no part of life that doesn't contain its lessons.
If you're alive, that means there are still lessons to be learned.

"There" is no better a place than "here." When your "there" has become a "here", you will simply obtain another "there" that will again look better than "here."

When ever my eyes accidentally catch a glimpse of these words behind the table glass along with the reflection of my own face, I quiet myself and spend few seconds thinking about what I have learnt so far and how much I accept my lessons without any complaints. If the answer for that minute is positive the reflection of my face shows it off – a bright face happy with what was received throughout the day. If otherwise - a face with a frown with lot of questions, complaints and what not.

Recently, I was reading a topic on Object oriented programming. I came across the following terminologies that forms a part of any system.
ENCAPSULATION --- Hiding of redundant informations.
ABSTRACTION --- Looking for only what is needed.

The former assists the later. It struck me very recently how deep the meanings are when I relate this to my real world system. I usually picturize this world as a PLAY... where everyone has a role to play…

The nature of the play follows the above 2 laws. It encapsulates what ever is not required for us to know. And we have to use the principle of abstraction to save our energy from toiling in wasteful work. The phenomenon of sorrow enters when even any of these 2 laws are violated. Whenever I try to poke my nose into others role in this WORLD PLAY, I violate the laws. Whenever I try to comprehend the logics and rules of this WORLD PLAY using my limited knowledge of the mind, I violate the laws.

Is it not a hard fact that most of the times we try to violate these laws?

posted by Sukanya Krishnan @ 12:55 PM

1 Comments:

At 9:54 PM, Nakaraj S said…
hey...never realised 'here' and 'there' can be used in such a complicated manner. Was kidding :)Nice thoughts and yes a bit on philospohical side. Lagey raho...:)

From the past...


One of my posts very naturally written in my other blog wen i was fuming, ferrocious and desperate over things in life....When i read it all over again what come to my mind is "NEVER RESIST CHANGE"

I just thot i wud paste those contents below...

Friday, March 10, 2006

Yet another day…


My Mourning blues..Oops Morning blues…

Ok…So its time again to get up with the same thought about what am I going to do at work today!! Oh..yet another day to go through… sitting at my same old office, going through the same old stereotypic work, attending the same old meetings with all the HEADS’ heads put together - yet arriving at no conclusion and no clarity…what nonsense am I doing…Why should I do it this way..why not do it even better..why do these people work as if its jus for the sake of it…why can't they handle things better even after working over the same job for more than a decade…GOK…I mean God Only Knows….

This same OLD office is the one am in only for the past 21 months..But it seemed like 21 decades…I work as a Production Engineer, in a place where except me all are men. I have to honestly admit I never came across any Gender Discrimination so far…But that itself was a slight discomfort for me most of the time…I had to sit with my ears closed…for some of the rubbish conversations going on around…for some of the stupid fights that will go up to the extent of personal abusing among themselves..for some of those immatured gossips …for some of their talks on their great experiences in bars.. for some of their proud boastings on that…oops…I was never prepared to take it…This USED to be my level of frustrations which was getting increased day by day inside…

But I am not regretting even for the slightest extent for choosing this field of Manufacturing which is solely a man’s world (even now)…Instead I had my side clear…I started to move out of the place before I could sense any discomfort approaching…Fine..before my whole idea of this post takes an offset, let me come back to the point...How to overcome these morning blues…or even evening blues…or blues as a whole…What is it that I am expecting out of life..?what is that I really think would keep me happy all the time…?I knew the answer…Once I knew, it was not at all tough to come to office after that..i felt happy taking up the challenge..Not all people run the race…many prefer to be an audience..

I feel, accepting what I have this moment is the greatest strength I can show towards the situations. I can not change what happens around me..i can't change people..am not here for that..but..I can have control over me..over my false expectations..over my perceptions..over my emotions and over my needs..My happiness doesn't lie outside..its well preserved inside…So just go for it..Grab this second..Make it eternal..and there is the happiness…Making each and every second successful and fulfilling for the self…The best thing i can do to preserve my happiness is to stop looking outside and turn inward...Still I sometimes feel dejected... but then I remind myself, the race is not yet over…its not yet another day now.. .but.. Wow!! There is another day more...

"The hardest thing in life, is letting go of what you thought was real."---- This was the simplest of the lessons i learnt recently...Lesson is simple..But way to go....

posted by Sukanya Krishnan @ 1:30 PM

2 Comments:

At 6:17 PM, The Soul Doctor said…
@ sukhanya you are a production enng!! Even I was doing production engg in PSG tech before i left it way back in 94 and became what I am now.And I thought TVS school was the only thing common between us.I chose production above even computers/eee/ece because that was the closest to mechanical engg in PSG tech . its another issue that I never had any inclination for becoming a stereotype engg.your second quotation is also very nice. are these yours or you read them somewhere?now coming to your mournings....I agree with you. it sucks to be in same office, atleast for me for more than 6 months. I believe that every proffessional worth his salt, would always think of a better way of doing things. Even i do so. And i face a lot of hardships getting my way through. i can well imagine how difficult it would be for you especially if you are the only woman in the whole office. When ever i hit road blocks like this, i just repeat this famous prayero god, give me the serenity to accept things the way they are, the courage to change things i can and the wisdom to know the difference between the two.anyways...good luck.nicely written article.

At 10:09 PM, Nakaraj S said…
hey nicely written stuff. It should have been a challenge for a woman in mfg organization. But I guess that what brings uniqueness to oneself.Read somewhere the most important aspect in future corporate life is 'people management'. I agree with that and I see your experiences are quite in that line. all the best!!!

Self Contentment, to me, is the result of internal realization of who I am and what do I possess and how unique I am , which in turn results in further realization of one’s inner potential and total freedom from the bondages of expectations, complaints, disappointments, anger, ego and many such vices.

A contended soul uses the physical eyes not to look out and compare with others but to look at others for tips for self development. Self contentment does not mean that the process of self development ceases but the process becomes much effortless and even inspiring for the others.

Being contended – Does it mean being enlightened? I feel Enlightenment is a process which doesn't end till there is existence. Then is contentment also a process which can only be continually improved and achieving the same would result in liberation? Indeed yes, till there is learning, changes and development are a constant process. In this process of life, nothing is permanent and what you hold as yourself also is subject to changes. Then how do I stay contended all time? Being aware of the self constantly helps out a lot. Almost 16 hrs of our day we spend watching outside. Do I watch myself? Am I aware of whats going on inside me? According to me, tuning the mind to listen to it for a while helps out a lot in the process of creating self awareness.

Contentment actually takes 2 different levels – Gross and Subtle. A gross level is always shallow, shaky and vulnerable to external conflicts. Subtle level is the outcome of self realization and requires sustenance.

I still can bring back my childhood memories where I used to feel contended with things of small values like spending my holidays on a swing made from a sari hung from the hook in the ceiling, watching a black and white movie on DD during Sunday evenings, learning cycling without falling even once, using my first ink pen, watching birds, buying a new dress etc etc. But nowadays as I grow up the gross elements for gross contentment is taking a much bigger form. If I keep on chasing these gross level elements that might satisfy me for a meager amount of time, when do I realize that this chase will be a never ending one like the case of a dog chasing its own tail? It is time now to open the eyes of wisdom and look inside for the real elements of contentment and move on to the next level.

When there is so much of work to do within ourselves we are always doing something else as work in this mechanical world which just results in adding up to the chaos that is already in plenty inside. Then does it mean that one should stop working and remain idle? Nay… Extremes are not safe at all always. A balance is what makes a harmony.

"Serenity isn't freedom from the storm, rather peace within the storm" - is the truth after all.